What Worship Does

So I finally broke down and started a blog. Seems people these days have a blog about everything. I have never been particularly interested in the whole idea for a few reasons. One being time, it takes time...something I am lacking these days ~ But as it turns out, I just so happened to have a leftover piece of chocolate birthday cake in my fridge. So Felicity is busy and I have a free 10 minutes to jot down some thoughts before I move on to cleaning her up ;-)

Last night my husband and a few friends blessed me with a keyboard for my birthday. As if it were destiny a sweet Chinese friend also gave me a large Starbucks coffee. So being the responsible nursing mother that I am, I decided to chug only half my coffee and spend the first half of the night banging on my new keyboard. The funny thing about this is, I don't actually play. I don't play well anyway. I see both the guitar and the keyboard as a tool to simply get out the song in my heart. Worship is such an amazing gift to me. All through scriptures I see how God causes songs to rise up in people.

 I was telling my husband that when I worship I feel like one of those old AM radios. All throughout my day my "ear" to hear the Lord sounds a lot like the fuzz from a radio that can't quite settle on a station, but when I begin to sing to the Lord, it's like the tuner starts to find it's spot and I can "hear" a bit more clearly.

The words that kept playing over and over in my mind last night were "Where else would we go Lord? Only you have the words of life!". Very appropriate words too, since earlier that night we sat talking about 1st and 2nd Thessolonians with several friends. No special speakers, no fancy music, no mics or sound systems, just hungry hearts and the scriptures, but more than enough to satisfy.

I remember when we first moved to Harbin back in March 2007. Back when I had only 2 little ones and I thought my hands were "full".

 Our move here was unlike anyone elses that I know of. We didn't have the funds for a preliminary trip to visit and get a "feel" for the land. It was either move there or don't go. So we came. We knew no contacts here. We spoke no Chinese, we knew nothing about Chinese culture...to say it was a rough first year is an understatement!!!! I am not a big "cryer" but during those first few months I would cry a lot and even got to the point where I would cry in public. My local KFC could have filled a coffee cup with the tears that I let flow while watching my kids play. Then one night I remember Scott pulling out the guitar and worshipping. I already knew that the Lord had given me a word to "Worship with the windows open" - but honestly I didn't "feel" like worshipping. I could sense His still small voice telling me to "Stand up and put your hands in the air". I wrestled with my pride for a minute or 2, and eventually decided I had nothing to lose. So I obeyed. That simple act of obedience proves to be powerful time and time again. I knew at that point God was trading my sorrow for joy, my tears for laughter. China didn't change, my husband's job with all it's stress didn't change, I wasn't a flunt Chinese speaker after that, people didn't stop telling me that I was a bad mother for not dressing my children in layers and layers of clothes, no one stopped spitting on the ground near my shoes, my TINY apartment was not suddenly beautiful - but the joy of the Lord had rescued me. Nothing about our circumstances has to change to experience His joy, and it's that joy that the Bible says is our strength! I need His strength, I must have His joy, so really worship is a life-line! It reminds us that we are small and God is great!

So will I make beautiful music and sound like Beetoven on my new keybaord? Don't count on it! But will I worship my heart out? I have to! I was created to! I remember a quote I heard once, though cheesy, it holds truth. It says "I don't want no rock crying out in my place". So join me, pick up your guitar, or your keyboard or even bang a pot, tap your toe - do something! Let's worship Him together. Let's bless His name! He loves to hear us sing, no matter the sound. I once heard Him speak to me while I was choking back tears and still trying to sing. He said "I love your voice most when it's muffled by the tears". He hears our hearts and when a heart of love flows through our song, He is blessed!